Vampire Conspiracy to Take Over the Earth!!! Aieeeee!!!

Sunday nights haven't been the same since Agents Mulder and Scully closed the book on The X-Files and vanished off our TV screens in the process.

No more nasty things creeping around suburbia after the sun goes down. No more experiments run amok. No more government cover-ups.

What are poor nerds like me do to fill the void?

Television thrives on the stealing of good ideas. I was weaned on the tube back in a magical time called the 1970s, when every single show in prime-time seemed to be a spin-off of Happy Days or All in the Family. But the highly-paid creativity thieves of network TV have never been able to create a decent counterpart to The X-Files.

Remember Dark Skies? Does The Burning Zone ring a bell? Did you catch Strange World in the few weeks it was on the air?

X-Files creator Chris Carter almost pulled it off with Millennium, but the program too quickly settled into a “serial killer of the week” format until its self–destruction in a confusing plotline which occurred after most of us had long since stopped watching. A surprising non-hit which aired in its big brother’s coveted Friday night spot.

The crucial element to the The X-Files, which all of the imitators seemed to miss, was its believability. I realize that might seem a contradiction in terms while describing what is essentially a modern-day spook show, but the key to a good fantasy is keeping one foot firmly planted in reality.

The Brothers Grimm knew it, weaving their tales around common people and events before introducing more fantastic elements... Edgar Rice Burroughs did too, and conformed his Tarzan and John Carter of Mars books to elaborate biographies, family trees, and timelines... The Night of the Living Dead (1968) is probably the scariest horror picture ever made because filmmaker George Romero placed it in modern-day Western Pennsylvania rather than a gloomy Transylvanian castle.

What works in fairy tales, books and movies works on television as well. The original Star Trek masked the dodginess of its futuristic sets largely because of a likable cast and a refreshing lack of technobabble (dilithium crystals not withstanding). Rod Serling and Richard Matheson wrote compelling characters and storylines into The Twilight Zone that kept people on their edge of their seats every week. The Jon Pertwee episodes (1970 - 1975) of Doctor Who had a higher shock quotient than the rest of the series by bringing an endless parade of alien menaces to the bell-bottom wearing England of the seventies, rather than some space station set far in the future.

I think the judge of good sci–fi, fantasy and horror television is how well the program allows people sitting at home eating corn chips on the couch the suspension of disbelief. It’s easier said than done. That’s why for every Star Trek, television execs churn out dozens of Cleopatra 2525s.

The X-Files did genre television one better, which was to achieve a level of believability more on the level of drama programs like E.R., Homicide, or NYPD Blue. It seemed that no matter how outlandish the plot in TV guide summary, at least from 9 p.m. to 10 p.m. on Sundays, it could be happening in your hometown -- or worse yet, your basement!

Closing the book on The X-Files was a sad day for science-fiction fans, of which I consider myself. The program will be missed.

But hope is on the horizon! Nerds left scrambling for a paranoia–inducing fix need look no further than the series Ultraviolet. But don’t don’t expect to find it channel surfing. It’s a British import from Channel Four Television, and is only available in this country as part of a DVD boxed set from Palm Pictures.

Ultraviolet is the story of homicide detective Michael Colefield, trying to track down his best friend and partner, who disappeared mysteriously on the eve of his wedding. Colefield’s investigation soon runs afoul of the covert organization CIB -- a cooperative venture between the British government and the Vatican.

Why are its agents using strange weapons like rifles with ultraviolet sights, charcoal–tipped bullets and tear gas that smells like garlic in its campaign against a common counterfeit ring? And how is his best friend tied up in all this?

Before long, Jack finds himself drafted against his will into the enigmatic organization and uncovers a decidedly supernatural conspiracy that affects not only his best friend, but the fate of the entire human race.

The production team deserves praise for its iconoclastic approach to a too-familiar legend that in lesser hands would probably turned into a campy mess along the lines of Buffy, the Vampire Slayer. The acting and production values maintain a high-level of believability throughout, with plenty of shocks delivered over six episodes.

Ultraviolet is compulsory viewing for fans of the macabre. The conspiracy builds to a nail-biting climax that leaves you guessing until the last edge-of-your-seat minute. And until Chris Carter and company get on the stick with their promised series of films, it’s the closest thing we’ve got to an X-Files revival.