Glass Family?

Glass Menagerie by: Tennessee Williams
Review by Tara L. Eastman

There is a tightrope that all families walk upon. Mothers and Fathers dance upon a narrow support to care and provide for the needs and desires of each other and their dependent children. Some families have the benefit of both parents to make a tag team tango of us against the world. Many families are carried upon the shoulders of an individual single parent with faces intent upon the goal while their legs and hearts tremble from the load of responsibility. No matter the number of supporting parents or guardians in a family, it is the perfect image of family that challenges many to work tirelessly for an unattainable goal.

There are always clothes to be washed, jobs to go to day in and day out, rooms to be tidied, bills to be made out and children to be cared for. In the midst of our daily dance of life, our children call to us with cheery voices saying; “Dad, will you come play super heroes with me?” or “Mom, can’t you come watch cartoons with me yet?” The childlike requests of our children reflect the lyrics of Harry Chapin’s song “ Cat’s in the Cradle”.

My son turned ten just the other day
He said, "Thanks for the ball, Dad, come on let's play
Can you teach me to throw", I said "Not today
I got a lot to do", he said, "That's ok"
And he walked away but his smile never dimmed
And said, "I'm gonna be like him, yeah
You know I'm gonna be like him".

Our children see who and what we about more than the people we work with or the friends that we may occasionally go out for coffee with. They follow the steps that we take with unflinching attention and before we comprehend it they are grown and have taken on and internally impressed the life they saw lived through us. Our children become like us.

In Tennessee William’s play, The Glass Menagerie, the effect of parent upon children is seen and shared from the perspective of Tom Wingfield. Tom is a young and restless warehouse worker, living with and supporting his southern-born mother Amanda and his crippled and meek sister Laura. Amanda and her children were abandoned by her husband early in their marriage, leaving her to support her children in a time when most women would never had entered the work force – unless widowed or abandoned by their husband as she had been.

A straightforward look into this family can allow the reader to criticize Amanda for her overbearing nature, or Tom for his escapism into movies, drink and books, or Laura for her weakness of spirit and self esteem; but at a more careful view the reader can begin to see themselves and potentially their own family reflected by the characters of this play.

Tom is a young man yearning for adventure and that is something sadly lacking in the occupation he holds as a stock boy in a shoe warehouse. In fact, how many spirited individuals go to work every day while their dreams of creativity and adventure dance just out of reach due the requirements of reality. There is some empathy and understanding for Tom if the reader has ever held a job out of duty to his or her family. Tom desires to be like his father, footloose and fancy free, but the conflict of the care necessary for his Mother and sister jolts him back to the drudgery of the shoe warehouse; at least for a little while.

Laura is a meek and handicapped young woman that desires nothing more in life than to gaze at beautiful things. Had Laura been born into a family of privilege, she would have had the possibility to go to museums and possibly even been trained as an artist. But the circumstances of her birth allow her no place in the world outside of her apartment. While her mother expects her to go to business college or have men calling on her every evening; Laura’s only desire is to look lovingly and care for the glass creatures in her lighted curio.

Laura is like any member of a family that may be emotionally or physically handicapped. Parents can be an advocate for their challenged child and provide opportunities or goals that are attainable. Parents can also become a great hindrance by looking at what they desire and then laying an impossible path to follow at their feet. In fact, this kind of “living through your child” is something that happens no matter the child’s natural ability or desire. Laura’s relationship with her mother is a classic representation of a mother trying to re-live her own youth through the actions and potential of her own daughter.
While Amanda presses her wishes upon Laura’s life and future, Tom understands that Laura just won’t be or become what her mother desires. Laura doesn’t defy her mother’s wishes out of rebellion like her brother Tom. Laura simply isn’t capable of living outside of the world her mother and brother had created for her. Amanda desires Laura to be a savvy businesswoman or a socialite. Tom knows Laura can’t be the debutante his mother desires but never stops to think what Laura could become with a little help and encouragement. The very people that desire to make something more out of Laura’s life have created a trap that she will never escape.

Amanda, Tom and Laura’s mother, is an aging and frustrated woman. Amanda is frustrated by her inability to keep a husband, to birth and raise healthy, happy and successful children, and her own inability to pursue her dreams. Amanda focuses on the grandeur of her youth. Wealthy men used to call on her every night. The townspeople from her southern home used to talk about and look up to her because beauty and abilities. She used to go dancing in beautiful gowns and never think about the cost of the evening. Amanda recalls her youth from the rose colored perspective of decades past, only touching upon regret when mentioning her weakness for the looks and charm of Tom and Laura’s father. Amanda believes that she fell in love with the wrong man and that one decision became the all influencing and damming decision of her entire life. If she wouldn’t have married him she could have married that man who became so wealthy. Then she and her children would not be in a tiny apartments living week to week on her son’s meager wages.

So many people base the making or breaking of a life on one decision. One wrong turn or perhaps that one lucky streak made their life the heaven or hell that is their current situation.

Mr. O’Conner, Tom’s friend from the shoe factory is invited to dinner as a last ditch effort to marry Laura off before she turns one day older. Mr. O’Conner is a lively, outgoing man that had been an old school mate of Tom and an unrequited crush of his sister. Mr. O’Conner fills the place of the eternal optimist in this family dynamic. He is working, going to school to improve himself, and trying to encourage others along the way. Tom expresses his plans to move away and go adventuring and Mr. O’Conner encourages Tom to join him on his own dream of getting into television production. Tom shrugs off the offer, as it’s not the adventure he’s hoping for.

Mr. O’Conner is delighted by the conversation at dinner with Amanda and at this moment the audience can see a glimmer of who she used to be before she abandoned her dreams to would of, should of and could of. As Amanda and Tom exit to the kitchen, Mr. O’Conner and Laura have an opportunity to visit. Laura is shy and stiff but as the conversation carries on she begins to open up and share more of her thoughts and ideas then with any other character in the play.

It is ironic that this visitor that stops merely on an informal invitation has such a great affect upon each member of the family. Amanda expresses more charm and hospitality than ever before and Laura finally sees herself a pretty as he kisses her. The engaged to be married Mr. O’Conner kisses Laura when caught in the moment of overwhelming concern, care and appreciation of her simple sweet nature. He accidentally breaks Laura’s favorite unicorn statue. He unknowingly pushes Tom to make the decision to leave home for good. Mr. O’Conner does apologize for his moment of passion, for the breaking of the glass statue and he sadly departs from the apartment knowing he did all he could to make things right and that it couldn’t possibly have been enough to make any positive permanent change. The glass menagerie was broken before he arrived as he carries the once unicorn now horse away in his pocket as a sad souvenir of the evening.

Mr. O’Conner’s departure from the apartment snowballs into many departures. All of Amanda’s hopes for her children leave with him, Laura departs by simply fading into the scenery and Tom finally leaves to pursue his adventure. While some would say this one man was the catalyst for all these changes, it is more likely that Mr. O’Connor’s character was full of opportunities that the characters just weren’t able to see. One more choice was made after thousands had been made. Tom, Amanda and Laura choose to become overcome by the impossible instead of looking for the potential right in front of them.

Children mimic their parents from a very early age. Laura thought all there was to become was something she couldn’t - a southern belle with many men callers and balls to attend. Amanda thought that she was to be the revered southern mother – wise with the years of her life and respected by her children. All Tom had of his father was a photo, a post card and stories of how charming and adventuresome he was – so he chased after that image, that dream of what he thought he should be. Sadly, Tom does become like his father. Tom is always on an adventure, but he can’t escape the guilt of leaving his mother and especially his sister behind.

The circumstances of life are influenced by more than one decision or choice. Amanda’s future was not set in stone the moment that her husband and son left her. Laura’s ability to succeed in life was not imprisoned by the brace she wore upon her leg and Tom wasn’t locked into abandonment of his family in pursuit of adventure. Instead of dancing when the opportunity presented itself, this family allowed themselves to be paralyzed by tiptoeing around a glass menagerie that they had created.

“I've long since retired, my son's moved away
I called him up just the other day
I said, "I'd like to see you if you don't mind"
He said, "I'd love to, Dad, if I can find the time
You see my new job's a hassle and kids have the flu
But it's sure nice talking to you, Dad
It's been sure nice talking to you"

And as I hung up the phone it occurred to me
He'd grown up just like me
My boy was just like me

And the cat's in the cradle and the silver spoon
Little boy blue and the man on the moon
When you comin' home son?
I don't know when, but we'll get together then son
You know we'll have a good time then.”

Imagine if this family and all the families represented by this play had the freedom to play ball when their children were small and spend time visiting when they were old. The freedom to love each other and play might make up for the handicaps we all have. It is necessary in the complexity of family life to understand that certain chores need to be done. Those daily chores have their place, but what if we were more interested in the people than the chores?
Asking people to live in a museum isn’t really fair – unless the people who live there are just ornaments or images to look at. Families are supposed to make messes, clean them up and then start all over again and again and again. Amanda, Tom and Laura needed to learn how to start over but starting over only works when everyone is willing to see the possibilities instead of the shortfalls. It is only when the potential of the O’Conner perspective is adopted that they will become the beautiful, awkward, imperfect human creation called family.